I've been involved in the NCT 'Location, Location, Location' campaign to hold NHS Trusts accountable for meeting the deadlines for birth choice in the government Maternity Matters document. My MP has actually been very helpful and I have had replies from the Undersecretary for the Department of Health as well as the Chief Executive of my local Trust. The former was not very promising, she basically fobbed me off saying that they had recruited more staff and therefore met the deadline (end of 2009), despite the fact that only 4% of women actually have a free choice of where to give birth - the target was 100%. My local CE however, was very positive, there are two new midwife-led units in development in the area and the Maternity Services Liaison Committee has been relaunched. I promptly replied saying I would like to join the MSLC! I am very driven to see changes in the maternity services offered and this is a great way for me to help do that.
All of this has fuelled my desire to help inform and empower women. Unfortunately, I am always finding people who do not welcome information. They would rather be afraid, surrender to the doctors in white coats because I suppose that is easier than finding strength from within.
I recently had a conflict with someone on an internet forum who said that she was "not allowed" to go past her estimated due date due to history of placental abruption. She lost her baby at 20 weeks because of this, so I understand why she is afraid. However, when I pointed out that no doctor can "allow" or "disallow" anything she became very upset and hostile towards me. She turned her story around, saying that she had asked for intervention if she did not go into spontaneous labour before 40 weeks as she felt that the stress and worry of another problem would cause her to have a traumatic birth. I tired to point out that there is nothing magical about her estimated due date and that her using the word "overdue" to any day beyond that is factually inaccurate and not helpful to her own state of mind. She really didn't like that!
I have been stewing over this for a few days and need to get this off my chest. Whenever women talk about doctors "not allowing" them to do something they are perpetuating the myth that doctors have power over our bodies during labour. It is this myth that keeps victims of birth trauma from realising that something wrong was done to them. Birth trauma is physical or psychological abuse, it includes intimidation ("Your baby will die if you don't let us do this") and sometimes even rape (vaginal examinations without consent). So when I encounter someone who is saying that she is "not allowed" to go past her EDD and that this isn't even the truth as she perceives it it actually makes me quite angry.
All of this has fuelled my desire to help inform and empower women. Unfortunately, I am always finding people who do not welcome information. They would rather be afraid, surrender to the doctors in white coats because I suppose that is easier than finding strength from within.
I recently had a conflict with someone on an internet forum who said that she was "not allowed" to go past her estimated due date due to history of placental abruption. She lost her baby at 20 weeks because of this, so I understand why she is afraid. However, when I pointed out that no doctor can "allow" or "disallow" anything she became very upset and hostile towards me. She turned her story around, saying that she had asked for intervention if she did not go into spontaneous labour before 40 weeks as she felt that the stress and worry of another problem would cause her to have a traumatic birth. I tired to point out that there is nothing magical about her estimated due date and that her using the word "overdue" to any day beyond that is factually inaccurate and not helpful to her own state of mind. She really didn't like that!
I have been stewing over this for a few days and need to get this off my chest. Whenever women talk about doctors "not allowing" them to do something they are perpetuating the myth that doctors have power over our bodies during labour. It is this myth that keeps victims of birth trauma from realising that something wrong was done to them. Birth trauma is physical or psychological abuse, it includes intimidation ("Your baby will die if you don't let us do this") and sometimes even rape (vaginal examinations without consent). So when I encounter someone who is saying that she is "not allowed" to go past her EDD and that this isn't even the truth as she perceives it it actually makes me quite angry.
Posts
4 comments:
"Unfortunately, I am always finding people who do not welcome information. They would rather be afraid, surrender to the doctors in white coats because I suppose that is easier than finding strength from within."
This really gets me too! People look at me with disbelief when I tell them my birth was beautiful, peaceful and calm. They look at me with annoyance when I say I'm sleeping fine, thanks to cosleeping, and become downright irritated when I talk about breastfeeding and how magical it is. It irritates me so much how people look at me disbelievingly that I sometimes just bite my tongue now and let them have their misery. Those who want to know more, will ask once they know where you stand.
This is what I am trying to do, put my view out there in a non-confrontational way and wait for anyone who wants to know more to come forward and ask.
I fear I may have been one of those people talking about "not allowed" at the time, but meaning it slightly differently (if that's possible!!).
Where I knew I had the option to disagree with the doctor I was paying to do what was best by me and the baby, I probably would have taken his advice had I needed to, since whether I like it or not, he ultimately knows more about the subject than me! Thankfully madam decided to come of her own accord at 38+2, but there was talk of the possible need to deliver early for a number of reasons.
This probably sounds like me disagreeing - but I'm not!(sorry - not making much sense am I?!)
I think it's fabulous how you're getting involved in a cause you are obviously so passionate about! I know you are going to help many, many women avoid the scenario you found yourself in and I hope it brings you the closure you hope for. x
Thanks hun :)
Post a Comment