Double Rant

OK, so I have to have one little rant about this issue, but I won't get OTT about it... But where the fuck are all the feminists?!! I feel totally alone here. I'm a freak for keeping my own name when I got married (in the last few years I can count at least six women I know who have got married and changed their names, not one who has kept their own), I'm a freak for thinking women should be paid the same wage for the same job as men. I get accused of not caring about the plight of women on an international scale just because I realise there is still inequality in our own country and other developed nations.

When I was younger, well until quite recently I suppose, I assumed that the vast majority of women my age (and a little older and younger) were feminists, or at least held a few of the same views as me. But I'm really struggling to meet another woman who thinks like I do and cares about the issues I do. It's like we got the vote then all the feminists hung up their sashes and went back to the kitchen sink.

So please, answer me this, where are all the feminists?

Second, this is ridiculous. Andy directed me to the story and at the time he was distinctly more aggravated about it than me, but having sat on it for 24 hours, I'm now kinda frustrated about it.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/berkshire/5297600.stm

It's a story about a woman who has been campaigning to ban violent porn after the death of her daughter by strangulation, the government have just agreed to close a loophole in the law. Now, not condoning what the guy did, he strangled her without consent and it happened that he owned some strangulation fetish porn, but this is such a gross overreaction and complete lack of understanding of humanity. OK, the guy was a killer, but I highly doubt that the films made him that way. More likely is he was predisposed to strangulation and sought out films depicting it, not every strangulation fetishist is going to kill someone, the overwhelming majority are going to practice it safely and have a safety signal arranged with their partner.

So such films are already illegal, but they're criminalising possession of "material featuring violence that is, or appears to be, life-threatening or is likely to result in serious and disabling injury". So we're actually talking about all action films, horrors, thrillers, some sci-fi and fantasy, crime dramas etc. We'll be left with a few romcoms. OK, so the wording of the law probably relates it directly to sex, rather than this general, catch-all wording quoted on the beeb. It just bothers me that the government would give in to this old lady who simply doesn't understand fetishes.

With or without porn, people are going to practice suffocation and strangulation and some people are going to take it too far and have accidents and even fewer are going to go out and kill people on purpose. It was like with the Jamie Bulger situation and people reacted by wanting to ban films like Child's Play, or with Columbine and the parents felt that Marilyn Manson was to blame. It is assuming that all people are vulnerable and easily led and that these influences are outright malicious, ignoring freedom of speech and the fact that millions of people get enjoyment out of these films and music without hurting themselves or anyone else. ARGH!!!

Birthday and Money

Ah, how time flies. I am alarmed at how fat the last year has gone. Here I am, birthday time again (tomorrow) and where am I compared to last year? I am one module closer to getting my degree; I am much happier; I am learning a new skill (POI!); I am working; I have lost touch with one or two more people; I have regained touch with one or two people; I have made new friends; I have got into new bands; we (Andy and I) have more disposable income; we are getting a new kitchen :D

I think that's about it. Before writing that list I had been thinking that not much had changed, that life was speeding by with very little progress. But I was, thankfully, mistaken!

So, the money thing, without going into emensley depressing and boring details, the money situation was bleak, dire in fact. But thanks to generosity, a degree of risk taking with investment, and a handy loan, the situation is looking up. Finally we are able to get to work on the house, starting with a new kitchen. I am significantly more excited about the kitchen than Andy, I'm the one who cooks. But he's the one who washes up and we are getting a dishwasher, so he must be happy about that. Sadly true to stereotypes, however, the aesthetics matter much more to me than him! I've had so much fun examining brochures, picking door handles, floor and wall tiles are the next step. We have had quotes, so now we need to choose whether we want to pay a "reassuringly expensive" price, or a lower price for potentially lower quality.

If any readers have kitchen-fitting horror stories, or high praise in fact, do please tell us, testimonies are the best source of information in matters like these!

So, even after the new kitchen, we are clearing a lot of niggling debts (like my course fees) and will have money left over each month for a social life and the odd CD or DVD! Yay!

DNA

Five times more people in the UK have their DNA records stored on central government records than in any other country in the world. Now DNA records do have a key role in the fight against crime - but that doesn't somehow mean that anything at all done with DNA records is therefore ok.

And there are some tough questions for Labour to answer about why they've built up DNA records far, far in excess of what is needed to help fight crime in other countries.

Questions like:-

Why should the DNA records of innocent people be kept indefinitely?

How secure really are the records? (The Observer recently pointed out that private firms have secretly been keeping DNA records that should have been destroyed.)

Where are the proper safeguards against mis-use of the data?

And what is the explanation for a quarter of the DNA records being from members of the ethnic minorities whilst they only make up under one in ten of the overall population; is there really no racial discrimination going on?

That's why last week Lynne Featherstone launched a petition with Nick Clegg, the Lib Dem Shadow Home Secretary, against this over-the-top database. Agreeing that DNA has important role to play in fighting crime doesn't justify keeping the DNA records for innocent people indefinitely and without proper safeguards.

You can sign the petition at this site.

Poi

I just bought my first set of poi! I got the chance to play with a friend's set at Download, loved it and seemed to do quite well for my first go. So finally I have bought my own and they're sooooo cute!

Dodgy Forum Experience

Why is it that you always encounter really rude people on internet forums? They always seem to be American, maybe that has something to do with it. What am I saying?! Obviously that's the problem. Get rid of the Americans and a forum immediately becomes civil and healthy debate flourishes rather than trading blows.

I was recently engaged with a moron (19 years old, American, avatar was a Marilyn Manson image, it was a pagan forum, the guy was clearly a wannabe) on the subject of women and the remaining inequalities in our society (rich world). He denied there was an existing inequality, or rather he felt that the scales had tipped and that women were in a better position than men (wtf?!). I mentioned in a post that I'm a feminist and his response was to highlight that word alone in the middle of his lengthy response to the rest of my post and simply state "I see". Now maybe it's just me, but that seemed awfully condescending, it was like "well, now I know not to take anything you say seriously".

Wanker. I'm all for people having different opinions to mine, but when people cling to these weird perceptions and ignore or brush off statistics as unreliable, I just want to scream. For instance, he had no trouble putting down such statistics as women earn 77% that of men in the USA. He actually had the gall to say that wages are decided by complex factors such as quality of work, implying that women's quality of work is lower than men's!!! I wonder what he would have said if I'd pointed out how few women there are in American politics. He also questioned whether it's right to want equality, giving examples of a strong, fast individual being superior to a less physically fit person and suggested that disabled individuals in wheelchairs ought to not be given job opportunities based solely on their disability.

How do people end up like that? I hope it is just his age and that as he gets older and has more contact with the world he will grow out of such awful views.